One year.

In one week Loganne will be one year old, I havn't had much time to write in this, as you can imagine. Mostly all you need to know, is I am still as excited to have her as the day she was born. I can't believe how faast this year has passed, and how lucky I am to be able to watch this amazing little girl grow and learn. But I can't help but think of the next year, and the many years to come. That being said, I have a few things to say, not to any of you, though I welcome you to read, but mostly to myself, and Loganne. Even if she may never read this.



Dear Loganne, 
You're first birthday is approaching sooner then I had hoped. I can think of a million mistakes I have made already, and I know there will be a million more. I'll never know how to do everything right when it comes to parenting, but there are somethings I can try to do to make you're life more fulfilling

I promise to put a band aid on every cut, and kiss every owie. I promise to not send you outside to play, but to play with you as often as I can. I promise to miss every party, and every work function, to tuck you in at night. I promise to cuddle you when you're sick, and make you laugh when you're sad. I promise to hold you're hand when we cross every street, and always make sure you wear your seatbelt.
I promise to teach you manners, how to read and write, your alphabet, and how to count - even backwards. I promise to stay up late to help you with your homework over and over again. I promise to teach you to work hard, and be honest. I promise to show you that being strong, can also mean having fun. I promise to respect you and you're opinion, and I promise to teach you to respect what I say. I promise to give you a unreasonable curfew, so you can be up for school in time. I promise to let you be angry with me, when I need to stand my ground. I promise to be fair with every punishment, and I promise to always explain why I need to punish you. I promise to share my mistakes with you, and to let you learn from them. I also promise to step back and let you make your own mistakes. I promise to always defend you, and I promise to make you take responsibility when you are wrong. I promise to protect you from as much as I can. And I promise to be there to comfort you when I could not protect you. I promise to let you climb trees, and play in mud, and be a kid. I promise to not burden you with mine and you're fathers responsibilities. I promise to let you blow you're first pay cheque, but also teach you to save money, and be responsible. I promise that no matter how awkward it may be, I will talk to you about sex, drugs, and alcohol. I promise to always have a open mind about any questions or opinions you may have. I promise to help you be safe with all of the above.

I promise to teach you kindness, love, respect to other human beings and animals. I promise to teach you to be passionate about what you care about. I promise to teach you about your family and where you come from. I promise to support you in anything you may do in life, as well as wherever you may go.

Most of all, I promise that I will forget all of these things at one point or another. But I promise it wont take long for me to remember. I promise that I will never have all the answers, and I won't always know exactly what to do, but I promise to always try.  I promise that I will lose my temper, and patience, but I will always let you know how much I love you, and how proud I am of you, no matter what. I promise to never be you're friend, but to always be your mother. Forever.

My eternal love,
Your mommy.